Excerpt:Relationships and Sex

A teenager is a young person whose age falls within the range of 13-19, they are called teenagers because their age number ends with teen. The teenage can be described as a transitional age from childhood to adulthood. It is a period when human developmental changes occur psychologically and physically. It can be both disorientation and discovery period when the teen clamours for independence and self-identity. Many teens face tough choices regarding sexuality, school and work, drugs, alcohol and social life. Peer groups, romantic interests and external appearances tend to naturally increase. The physical, biological and psychological changes they experience allow them to think more abstractly. They become interestingly focused on friends and also seek greater independence. They often come into conflicts with their parents, they get through teen age with few problems like, establishing an identity and preparing for adulthood.  

Teenagers spend a good deal of time not only on developing the requisite social skills but also discovering their own and their friend’s sexuality. The values and beliefs developed in the teenage years about the opposite sex are often carried into adulthood with little modification. Teenage girls quickly become convinced that teenage boys are constantly thinking about sex. This is probably not accurate, at the same; they become convinced that the number one objective of the vast majority of teenage males is “scoring”. Many teenage males quickly come to the conclusion that the young women expect them to behave this way and they are often more than happy to comply with these expectations. Young women quickly begin to believe that young men, as a group are crude boars and insensitive to the more subtle parts of a relationship. Young women become convinced that the only part of a relationship that matters to men is the sex.

Lies Christian teen tell themselves about sex

Everybody does it

No. Not everybody is having sex. While the media and people in the school may make it seem like everyone is having sex, there are just as many Christian teens and unbelievers too waiting till marriage. Doing something just because everyone else is doing it is just giving into peer pressure. It takes a stronger person, or person backed up by the strength of God, to resist temptation.            

When you stand up to peer pressure you are actually saving yourself from committing sin and also building a better future for yourself.

It’s No big Deal

Emotions and spiritual struggles that come from having had sex outside marriage is one of the reasons God placed such emphasis on sex and relationships in the Bible. Sex is a beautiful act that comes out of the marriage covenant and it means more than just an action.

Virginity is a state of mind

Some people use the term “technical virgin” when describing sexual status. Usually, this means that the person has not had a sexual act that involved penetration, virginity is not a state of mind.

You should be conscious not to involve yourself in any form of sexual acts until you are married. Usually, technical virgin is the excuse used if someone wants to justify participating in sexual activity.

Sex and love are the same

Sex and love are different, but sex is meant to be one of the complements for love in a married relationship. If you love someone, it does not mean you should have sex with the person. Sex is an act. Love is an emotion. They are very different and it can be dangerous to mix them up. You should never feel like you have to have sex with someone just because you want to show them you love them. There are plenty of non-sexual ways to show your love to someone.

Sex is a minor sin  

There is no minor or major sin, sin is sin, and every sin is big and grievous before God. For as many that are Born-again, we have forgiveness in Jesus Christ through His blood. Pre-marital sex is wrong. But you will have to live with the consequences of the act you have committed. It can be difficult if you are not prepared yet to deal with the emotion and feeling of sexual desire, it can totally destroy one’s life.

Oral sex isn’t really sex

Most times when you hear such statement, it basically to defend wrong doings. Oral sex is a sexual act, do not be deceived, it health implications are very serious too. It can be dirty and also wrong for anybody to indulge in.

Heavy petting is okay

Is a big deal, it can lead to other things. It can lead to sexual intercourse. It is very easy for Christian teen to get caught up in the moment and forget about any desire to stay away. It is very tempting and it does not always come with warning or stop signs.

 My will can overcome any temptation

God’s will, can overcome any temptation. If you have the strength alone to conquer any temptation, you are setting yourself up for trouble. Man is known for falling into sin, especially when there is overconfidence in the self. Christian teens need to keep their eyes on God; so that they can allow God help them set boundaries to resist the devil. The Bible is full of helpful advice when it comes to coping with temptation and it can be a useful tool.

watching porn or masturbating  is not real sex

A lot of people believe that pornography and masturbation are helpful in preventing a person from having sex. However, pornography is not just a film, what about what it does to your mind? Is there any way you can successfully watch pornography without thinking of it later? So I will advise that watching porn and masturbating will cause you a very great damage emotionally and it can be a total destruction of your person.

I’ve already had sex, so it’s too late for me

It is never too late. While the idea of “Born-again virgin” may seem a little like “technical virgin,” it is not the same thing. Many Christian teens that have already had sex choose to act as if they have never had sex and vow to wait until marriage. Having had sex is not the end of the world. God is very forgiving and He smiles at those who return to him with desire to do His will. While the temptation for someone who has had sex can be even stronger than the virgin, it can be overcome with God’s help. God is waiting to welcome you with open arms.